Are They “The One”?

So many of us are desperately looking for answers when it comes to dating, relationships, and marriage. One of the biggest decisions we will ever face is in choosing our future spouse. Is he/she the right one? How do we know we aren’t making a gargantuan mistake?  And where’s God in all of this? What does He have to say on the subject?

Turns out, not much. I mean, God doesn’t have as much to say as we would like to think. I know this from personal experience. You see, when I started dating my now husband, an old flame of mine re-entered the picture (it’s like they have “she’s moved on” radar). My ex-boyfriend essentially proposed to me. And what did I do, you ask…

Continue reading Are They “The One”?

I’m a Bad Friend…

I’m sure my husband is sick of it. And heck, you might be sick of it, too. And I’m sorry if this theme has become redundant, but this is where I’m at right now. This is what I’m walking through.

You see, I’m a bad friend. For all my complaining and pity-party throwing, it turns out that I’m not all I’m cracked up to be. I mean, sure, I might appear to be a super cool friendly type, but really, I could improve.

I’m a bad friend for lots of reasons… Continue reading I’m a Bad Friend…

Happy Thanksgiving!

Everyone, I hope you have a wonderful and very Happy Thanksgiving. Enjoy your families and long weekend. Rest. Eat. And most of all, be thankful.

I, for one, will be doing all of the above. Expect my return next Monday, after the long holiday. And please know: I’m thankful for you, my loyal readers.

Porn, Your Marriage, and Our Lackluster Sex Lives

Today I’m writing over at the Good Women Project on Porn, Your Marriage, and Our Lackluster Sex Lives. Here’s how I begin:

They want you to believe that pornography isn’t harmful, and safe even. They want you to believe that it is somehow vastly different from actual physical adultery. They want you to believe that pornography in no way effects your sex life, except that it enhances it and makes it “sexier.” They want you to believe that porn can actually jump start a dull sex life and bring about renewed sexual desire in a marriage. They want you to believe that a husband or a wife viewing pornography will look at their spouse exactly the same way even after staring at strangers’ naked bodies. They want you to believe because they know good and well that it is all a lie, but the more of it you fall for, the better.

Read the rest…

What if God Treated Us the Way We Treat Him?

I heard someone say the other day how thankful we should be that we don’t serve a mean, vicious, spiteful, or angry God. We don’t serve a God of ancient Greek mythology who meddles in our lives for self-gratification or, worse, out of boredom.

No, we should be thankful because we serve a good God–a kind, generous, faithful God. I’ll admit, though, that I had never really contemplated the fact that our God could have been some other type of God. He could have been a mean, forgetful, neglectful God.

And what if He was? What if God treated us the way we treat Him? It’s not a perfect, apples-to-apples comparison, but play along anyway.

If God treated us the way we treat Him… Continue reading What if God Treated Us the Way We Treat Him?

Friday Findings: Pretty Pictures and Fighting Cancer

Frieday Findings on Modern RejectFriday, sweet Friday, it felt as though you would never get here this week. And I’m so thankful you’re here now.

Can you believe that this time next week we’ll be overdosed on tryptophan and cranberries (just the way I like it). But until then, I’m holding off on entering the holiday season as long as possible. So today’s Friday Findings are holiday-free. First up…

Piccsy. How did I not know about you? You are like a long lost cousin to Pinterest, only much sexier and better looking. Oh, and British.

Piccsy represents mankind. It is all of the emotion, the beauty, the wild, the valor, the humanity, the hatred, in pictures. Crude, beautiful, delightful, whimsical, and even painful photos. It is our good ideas, our funny ideas, and our terrible ideas.

It is a montage of human life and I am hooked.

Beautiful packaging. Now maybe you’re not like me in this, but I sure do appreciate some nicely packaged product. The weirder or more clever, the better. Then I found this list of 30 Bizarre and Creative Packaging Design examples the other day and was psyched to peruse the examples shown. There is some genius to be seen.

My favorite read(s) of the week. From Theology 21, Mannequin Nipples And Erotomania: Rethinking Consumer Culture (yes, that’s really what it’s about) From The Resurgence, Homemade People, about the importance of our homes.

Young and battling cancer. You may have seen the movie 50/50 recently about a young man in his twenties diagnosed with cancer. Well, turns out my husband and I know someone who is currently facing the same thing. Billy Price a.k.a William Price III is a friend of ours and was recently diagnosed with Hodgkins Lymphoma. He is 28.

Billy loves Jesus. He trusts God and this is how much…he tweeted this last month to announce the news:

Yesterday I was diagnosed w/ Hodgkins Lymphoma. It’s a very treatable cancer. I’m feeling great & by the grace of God we’ll kick its ass.

Billy is now blogging about this turn of events. His blog isn’t all cancer talk. It is also humor, politics, love, life…Start reading. You won’t regret it.

So where did this week take you? Read anything great? Find anything new? Got any recommendation for me? Let’s hear it.


Does Life Stop After Kids?

I attended a wedding recently. Over dinner, my husband and I sat across from a newlywed couple we know. We started in on the usual chit chat. They asked us about our kids.

During our conversation, I misheard the wife and thought she had said something about having a baby. Her husband quickly and loudly corrected me. “No! No baby! Not anytime soon!”

We all laughed. They then explained some of their “baby hesitation” to us. They had a few couple friends who became pregnant and promised that having a baby would not affect their friendships or lifestyles.

However, once babies were born, their friends slowly disappeared. No more dinners, no movies, no evening hangouts. They vanished and were sucked up in the baby vacuum swirling with car seats, burp cloths, and the dreaded suburban nightmare: the minivan!

They asked us point-blank: “What have you not been able to do since having kids?”

Jonathan, my husband, and I paused for a second and looked at one another. Then we replied in unison… Continue reading Does Life Stop After Kids?

Go On, Ask Me Anything…

Since I started writing here on Modern Reject, I’ve had the great privilege of answering many of your questions. Granted, I’m not always sure of the answers. Many times I don’t know exactly what to say, but still you ask…and still I’m honored to respond.

So today, you get to ask me all of your burning questions. You can ask anything. That’s right anything (well, don’t get creepy or turn into that guy).

Do you have blogging questions? Want to know something personal about me? Wondering why I write about this and not that or where I  stand on a theological point? Do you have a question about marriage, sex, or dating? I’m all ears. Just ask!

My promise it too that if you ask the question in the comments, I will answer you. Cross my heart. But here’s the catch: you have to answer the question too. So go for it because, I can’t wait to read your questions…


Continue reading Go On, Ask Me Anything…

DON’T Be Yourself

DON'T Be YourselfA lot of people seem to think that who you are is more important than what you do. “Just be yourself” has become a slogan in the self-esteem movement.

Being yourself is touted as some kind of aspiration worth achieving–a sort of goal that, once fulfilled, equates to happiness and wholeness.(Doesn’t Oprah tell people to “be themselves” along with telling them they are their own gods?)

When life throws you trouble, people tell you to be yourself. When conflict arises, people tell you to be yourself. When you question your purpose in life, we often remind ourselves to, well, just be ourselves.

But what if being yourself is what got you into trouble in the first place? What if being yourself ain’t so great? I propose that you actually shouldn’t be yourself.

Continue reading DON’T Be Yourself